Leaving for CO tonight...

I'll be there for a week. plus this weekend and next weekend

oh boy. went to the Dallas Museum of Art last night with a bunch of friends... I'll come back later today probably and make an edit to tell all about those shenanigans... long story short, got home at 12:30 last night, slept throught my alarm and woke up to my second alarms set for 5 min before my goal departure time. funnn. it's one of those give-me-espresso-and-don't-ask-questions mornings. hah. currently I'm walking in place/doing a little dancin at my desk to Canton Jones. come on, blood flow! ok. more later. ok. :D

Drink Up That Swimming Pool

I really enjoy C.S. Lewis' thoughts and writing. I could spend a whole afternoon browsing quotes from C.S. Lewis. In fact, yesterday, I very nearly did. Here's a few with an interesting thread..

"The surest way of spoiling a pleasure isd to start examining your satisfaction."

-C.S. Lewis

"The true enjoyments must be spontaneous and compulsive and look to no remoter end"

-C.S. Lewis

"Many things-- such as loving, going to sleep,, or behaving unaffectedly-- are done worst when we try hardest to do them."

-C.S. Lewis

So I'm not getting my car radio fixed right away-- gotta get the rest of it fixed up first :)

BUT.. I did get my dresser put together yesterday. I mean, it's not occupied as of yet, but it looks like a dresser.. baby steps, right? lol.

Leaving for Colorado tomorrow night... I haven't started packing yet.. oh boy.

Man... working at Kenneth Copeland Ministries... there are just so many resources all around me.. and not to mention the Bible which is bottomless, and the flood of new revelation that just keeps on acomin' lately... I don't even know where to start. I want to cover all of this, take it all in, but I just can't handle it all at once. It's like if I were thirsty, and I asked you for some water, and then you threw me into your swimming pool and said, "drink up". But then, God did say he would open the windows of heaven and pour out blessings such that we wouldn't have room to receive them. So I guess.... bring it on >:)

The good, the bad, and the ugly (so cliche)

well. I'm all signed up for defensive driving at Golden Corral on August 29. 9am-3pm. yuck. but I'll follow it up with some CLUE action and all will be well :)

I located a place that can fix my CD player... It's gonna be a little 'spensive sounds like.. but we'll see ;) I have the favor of God.. maybe they'll look at it and be like, "oh. I can fix that. don't worry about it." lol. Anyway, I'm taking it in after work today... just gotta figure out where it is... :p

I didn't get my dresser put together. Not even close. BUT, I did take a nap. And go see G.I. Joe. Which was pretty darn awesome. Not quite up there with Iron Man, but it was going in the right direction and came fairly close :)

Next on my list, after getting my car fixed, is to:
A) track down what books I need for my classes and find out what day they actually start
B) file a change of address.. needs to be done.
C) make a dent in the long list of Terri Foy and Jeremy Pearsons teachings that I've been meaning to get my hands on... these might not actually happen in exactly this order. lol.

So I didn't have to iron any clothes this morning. Sooo nice. I actually got out of the house almost 10 minutes early :)
I've been reminded lately of something Billy Burke said at one of our KCM staff chapels a few months ago (I wasn't here for it, but it was one we were shown during training)
... He said something to the effect that, working in the ministry will pull out of you whatever you've got on the inside of you. Spiritual fruit will begin to manifest according to what seed you have been receiving-- but there's two sides of it. It wont be JUST patience, goodness, kindness, peace, etc. that manifests, it'll be whatevers inside of you. the good AND the bad, the glory AND the ugly. lol. I guess you could say we've seen some of that in me lately. I've been growing and filling up alot.. ALOT alot. But obviously there's some junk in there too, and what's in there is what's going to be manifest in my life. On the bright side of that, when it comes out is when you can deal with it, and find out where it's coming from, and pull it up by the roots. Fun stuff. Except, gardening is really not my pastime of choice...

Pinch of Salt, Dab of Grace

so my last post was... emotional, to say the least. But i'm going to leave it up. This is my official, "i know better than what i wrote there." Actually, I knew even as I was writing it that those were just feelings and would pass soon enough.. but it helps me sometimes to spit the feelings out so I've got a little room to iron out the thoughts and be completely honest with God. So I'm leaving that blog intact, but don't read it without reading thisd afterthought, and the many blog entries accessible from this site that rave about God's goodness. because I mean, He's pretty swell, and deserves a better shout-out than what I afforded yersterday.

You know, I miss writing. I know only a couple of people read this blog, including Cass who like a stalker reads it and never lets on.. But it's beneficial for me, I've decided. And who knows, if I start writing something actually relevent to more than myself, I might even get a few more readers. :p

So today's Tuesday... another glorious day at Kenneth Copeland Ministries. If you ever get the chance to visit KCM Partner Center in the wee small hours of the morning, do it. It's one of the most peaceful places on this earth. Nobody's here but night security and last shift prayer ministers, who've been praying literally all night.

Today I need to:
-sign up for defensive driving. (via phone? hrm, we'll try internet first... then phone :)
-get the cd player in my car replaced (it got a cd stuck in it.. no bueno. we got the disk out, but it befuddled my CD Player.. so off to get a replacement asap. road trip on friday, and cass just got the wcbc cd's... and I'm not making that drive without a cd player. nuff said.)
-put my dresser together and move my clothes into it... and iron and hang up the rest. (Somehow I'm not entirely convinced this one's gonna be completed today)
-Chill. maybe do a little journaling? writing? watch a movie? sleep? we'll see...

Two bites I'm chewing on today...
Ezekial 36:26 &
Matthew 6:33

good stuff. peace out \m/

because i can

two in one day... because i want to vent. Or, perhaps whine would be closer to the truth.

a long time ago, it was prophesied over me that i would be like an explosion. basically, that i would be in some people's lives the blast that tears down whats already there and clears the way for God to build something new. In a way, this has been true. At that time, I didn't really know what to expect of that. I mean... it sounded god i suppose... i don't know how i'm going to be the clearing dynamite for God's building projects... i guess i just kinda figured i was gonna be so hardcore for Christ it would just blow peoples minds. And maybe that's happened. But on the other hand, i can think of a few instances where it's not so pretty as it sounds. And i feel alot more like 9/11 than dynamite joe. Things have happened and someone's mindset about who they are and who God is and this world and the people around them are completely revamped and it's for the better, and at the end of it all i look like the complete bad guy. It really doesn't look like i was a planned part of the building process, it just looks like i was some huge natural disaster that God somehow brought some good out of. and i know its not necessarily how it looks to me or another person or everybody else that's really important in the grand scheme but... it still kinda hurts.
people tell me all the time how amazing i am and yet its pretty much plain and obvious how much i'm really not. i'm supposed to be a light to the world and all i can think is that i wouldn't really want to look at me.. dont see whats so special. and if i really am... then how come it always seems like it's a matter of time until im back in that same place watching everybody else at the groundbreaking ceremony, and no idea why i'm not?
i don't know... i guess it's good to get some thoughts out...

a little blurb and some recap

I recently watched the movie Julie and Julia.. with Meryl Streep and Amy Adams (whom I find myself beginning to adore)
anyway, the movie is basically about Julie blogging about her life following in the footsteps of Julia, so to speak. It looked like such fun, it made me want to start blogging again. ..or, just reminded me. lol. not the London hasn't been reminding me anyway.

okay, for all you supplement-takers out there, do you ever burp sometime after taking vitamins, and it tastes like vitamins? I find this experience exceptionally unpleasant. Hello body, obviously if I wanted to taste the substances I'm consuming, I wouldn't be consuming them in pill form.

so three months. wow. For the sake of keeping the blog at a justifiable length, I'm going to try to do a basic recap for those of you who are interested in 100 words or less. here we go...
Alright. Last post was in May... since then there's been June, which I spent working at Dallas Young Artists, stage managing The King And I, and working with lots of incredibly talented young people, and an amazing production staff that I count myself privileged to have been a part of. At the same time I worked what hours I could at Roots and made some money :) Also in June I was hired as a CSR for Kenneth Copeland Ministries, and Jon and I decided to stop seeing eachother, romantically. The break was amicable, no worries.
Then comes July. July I started training at KCM, and loving every minute of it. It's a wonderful thing, to be right where you're supposed to be and know that you know that you're in the will of God. In a way, I feel like I'm being paid to go to Bible school. Part of my job is to have at least a somewhat comprehensive knowledge of KCM products and activities, so I spend my downtime between calls reading books, or the bible, or watching broadcasts, or recorded meetings, or staff chapels, or prayer... or bloggin, as it were. But what you put in is what you're gonna get back, quite literally. Did I mention that I'm a huge fan of this job? God takes such good care of me...
Some other things happened in July.. I moved into my new apartment.. developed friendships that were made at DYA some.. some other stuff.
August somehow is half over already... wild...
Alot of time has been taken up with working and getting settled in the new apartment and whatnot. Hanging out when I have the time... I've started working out regularly, except for last week when I was at the Southwest Believer's Convention as much as possible. I had a run-in with poison ivy, which has happened many many times past without so much as a red bump on me... this time it got into my skin though and the results were less than pleasant. The Lord healed me though, and my momma took care of me and gave me some stuffs to speed the process along. nice try, poison ivy.

That was more than 100 words I'm sure, but I've no actual desire to count. You'll hear more about August as it comes and goes. But that's it for now :)